For a few hours I thought things were going to be okay, but now not so much
I really want to sleep but I can’t. I can’t stop thinking or crying. I just want her to lay next to be and tell me that it’ll be okay. She’s the only person who can ever comfort me. And now I have no one to do that.
Not hearing her voice before I fall asleep is probably the worst thing in the world and I have a feeling it’s something that I’m going to have to get used to.
Fuck up. Fuck up. Fuck up. Fuck up. Why don’t you just keep destroying your relationship some more? That’s all you do. Every single day you say something wrong or do something wrong. Soon she’s going to stop forgiving you. She’s going to know you’re just some fucked up little girl that she wants nothing to do with. Just like everyone else already realized.
I’m kind of at the point where I dont want to be alive again. I have nothing. I don’t have friends, I hate my school, everything is a mess. I feel like shit all the time again. Just like I did last year. No motivation to do anything, not even eat. I just want to sleep forever and wake up 10 years from now and everything will be better then. I doubt it though, I’ve said that for years and nothing is getting better. It is just this way and that is how it will always be it seems.